Reviving the outdoor furniture

Last month I wrote how Ronseal had ruined our wooden outdoor furniture by aging it somewhat prematurely. I wrote to their customer service team who offered to refund the cost of their product and replace with something else from their range. I accepted their £15 but refused the freebie as I was so annoyed with Ronseal that I didn't believe that a different product from them would be any better.

Rob found a Garden Furniture Revival kit from Cuprinol, no, I'd never heard of them either. We paid £24.99 (though right now it's on sale for half that from godfrey-diy.co.uk). As you can see from the photo, half an hour of sanding with an electric sander and two coats of Cuprinol and viola, good as new. Just in time for some lovely spring weather...

Clean as a whistle

We had a plumbing situation last week. The downstairs loo was starting to take ages to drain and occasionally it would make hideous gurgling sounds, which would travel up into the hand basin.

There's nothing more scary than a sink which gurgles in a threatening manner, especially when it occasionally regurgitated soapy bubbles. After two weeks of gurgling and nervous flushing I called up a drainage company to come and work their magic.

It turns out most houses will need their drains unblocked at some point owing to a combination of Victorian era drains and the amount of paper that goes down loos. Toddler wet wipes for example are marketed to help kids get motivated about dealing with their own business, but unfortunately they don't break down - even when wet - and subsequently build up and cause a blockage.

The company I used was called Invincible Drain Care (Tel 020 7428 7755). They charge £95 + VAT for the first hour. Our job took 90 minutes and ended up costing £162. Both bathrooms and the kitchen and washing machine flow systems were all checked and the the actual blockage was dealt with relatively painlessly. They came the day after I phoned so no complaints there.

The next time you're sitting at work hating your job, try and be grateful that at least you don't work for a drain clearing company.

(PS photo at top is a general snap of the house last weekend - I didn't publish the photo of the inside of our drain as it would seriously put you off your lunch)

Splashback and dull concrete

Ages ago I mentioned I'd photograph all the outstanding things in the house. But after a few photos I got a bit despondent. It feels like it'll be a year before all the little niggling things are taken care of, and that's before phase two gets a look in. Anyway, here are two of the most noticeable.

At top is the kitchen wall without a splashback. It's in a pretty strong shade of green - I forget the details (Lime? Chartreuse?) but I've definitely gotten used to it. It's meant to be covered with glass, which would be terrific given how many messy meals and explosive espresso accidents I've endured in the last year.

The holdup has been because of our concrete counter top, pictured below. The finish has peeled in places and looks really dull in others. The whole lot needs sanding back and refinished with a stronger lacquer which will make it look super glossy again. Once this has been done we can do the splashback - if we did it the other way around the glass might crack when the concrete is being sanded.

The guy who did it orignally is back from touring with his band and says he should be able to do it in a couple of weeks. It's been virtually impossible to get a concrete specialist to quote for this job in the last year as most won't touch surfaces they didn't install themselves, as they can't - or won't - guarantee the workmanship. Catch 22 anyone?

Re-mortgage merry-go-round

Two months ago we came off our crazy low mortgage rate onto the standard variable rate, which meant an increase of 6.5x on what we'd been paying. We had our broker on the case to try and sort an improved rate and had a bank valuer over. Long story short - the valuation came in £9K below what we needed it to be. The goal was to prove that the mortgage we'd borrowed was 75% of the value of the house. That magic 75% meant a drop in the interest rate so it was worth pursuing.

£9K isn't a massive discrepency and I'd met a valuer socially who said all banks have a £10K margin of error anyway. Just to be on the safe side we got two local real estate agents to provide comparables - which are examples of similar properties under offer or recently sold in the same (or very near) postcode. We ended up with five comparables plus a statement from the agents that our property was worth at least £40K more than what the valuation came in at.

The bank wouldn't budge and took a leisurely five weeks to let us know. NB we are not borrowing any more money, we have the same sized mortgage as before, we just wanted the better interest rate.

Sod that. We went to another bank. Despite the hasty patch up job on the ceiling the new valuer was a true gent. We showed him updated comparables and a recent quote for our house from Keatons and his valuation came in the very next day £45K more than the last guy.

I can't thank Debby from Keatons enough: we bought this property (and our last one) from Keatons and despite not being able to earn a penny from this transaction she provided comparables twice, and wrote a letter stating her professional valuation of our house to help us. It's not often you can really recommend real estate agents but here's one to contact if you're looking to buy or rent in Hackney!

Oh and with our new valuation, this means that we're able to get an even better rate of interest as our mortgage is now 70% of the value of the property - result :)

A seeping problem

I have what is technically called an ensuite bathroom that I've been using as a shoe storage facility. The water pressure was so dire it was pointless using the shower, but I could stack six boxes up to the roof. In December we got a new boiler installed and at the time the plumber had tested the shower pressure in the ensuite.

Two days ago I noticed that one of the plastic shoe boxes was half full of gungy coloured water. The shower head had been dribbling for the last four months. I pulled out all the boxes, the one pictured below was the worst of them: 18 pairs of shoes were water damaged, 10 were so far gone that they were unsalvageable. My £300 pair of suede Christian Louboutins - which are so uncomforable I've worn them three times - were mouldy. Of all my shoes, these are the one pair I wanted to save (£100 per wear is ridiculous, regardless of comfort).

Unfortunately, moving the boxes meant that the water was able to seep into a broken wall tile and within hours the ceiling in the TV room AND the spare room had both developed ugly brown watermarks.

Rob has now blocked off the leaky shower attachment with a special plug. He's going to do an emergency paint job tomorrow night. We have 48 hours to get it looking reasonable as the bank valuer is coming over for another round - the last valuation was so ludicrous we decided not to pursue a mortgage with that particular bank... great timing, but these things never seem to happen at a good time. It really is never ending isn't it?

What does it say on the tin?

In September we bought our outdoor furniture set from Ikea. It consisted of an acacia wood table and six matching chairs. I wrote a post about how we found the perfect set, and the driving required to secure it right here.

Within a fortnight of purchasing the table and chairs, I'd covered it with three coats of Ronseal Perfect Finish Garden Furniture Oil (£15 inc delivery). Ronseal's advertising slogan is: "Does exactly what it says on the tin". Upon peering at the packaging on their website it looks like it says "The quickest and easiest way to enhance and protect garden furniture".

As you can see from the photos, it doesn't actually protect or enhance garden furniture. In fact, we probably would've been better off NOT using this product. Within four months of winter weather, the surface started to bubble and lift. The constant rain during February didn't give the wood a chance to dry, so we bought a massive cover for £20 off Amazon. Despite being protected for the last six weeks, the table looks even worse for wear now that the Ronseal has lifted off completely, taking the wood stain with it. The table looks bleached and ancient.

I was expecting to get at least a couple of years before having to treat it again, so having really no more than five or six months is unbelievable. My neighbours (who have the same table and also used Ronseal) have the same problem, though theirs isn't quite as bad as ours. Our chairs are also suffering though not as bad as the table, yet.

We'll be sanding the table down and putting a new finish on it, none of Ronseal's products will be used though. As the table is available in Ikea again for £125 it was tempting to buy another one, but a few hours of elbow grease will sort it out...

You light up my life

One of my favourite birthday presents turned out to be a light. (Thank you Malcolm & Andrew!) Yup, I am digging something really practical. I may've mentioned I'm old mature now. This light has 256 possible colour options, and it can either phase through each one, like a slow-mo disco enhancement, or you can choose the light to match your mood. You need a bit of white wall for it to shine onto and a power socket and bam! Instant party starter. No, not really, but the kids were impressed for all of ten minutes.

I have to admit, it really does make the room warmer (well, with that expanse of glass and white it wouldn't take much).

The light is called a Philips mini LED and is available here for £69.95. Progress on hanging the rest of our art is at a standstill but I'm pretty sure having more up will make it seem warmer still...

Turn it up!

Last week was a landmark week: yes we finally hung our first bit of art on the wall (my sister-in-law's graphic painting, refer earlier post) and I turned 40. People keep asking me how it feels to be 40... and I have to say, pretty much the same as 39, 38 etc. Maybe even better. I haven't thrown a big birthday party for myself since I was 25 so this was a good excuse to throw open the doors and invite some of my nearest and dearest to come and celebrate.

Fortunately, Rob bought me a set of Numark turntables, a mixer with iPod docking station and a very loud amp and speaker combination for my birthday. (I'm ignoring the fact that the speakers are in "beech effect"). I went to Ikea to buy yet another grey metal cabinet (now on sale for £32!) which houses all my vinyl. I am thinking about shipping over another two crates of vinyl I have in storage in New Zealand - there are definitely some gems in there, but I have a habit of buying records for their covers so no doubt there'll be lots of doozies too.

I ended up with three friends who are also professional DJs at my birthday (and a few bedroom ones) and had democratic DJing till way after the sun came up (apologies to my very accommodating neighbours). The soundsystem kept feeding back as I'm told the pickups inside the cartridge heads don't like being so near the metal of the cabinets so we had to pad it out with towels - will find a rubber backed mat for next time. The good news is that despite ramming in fullsize Roulette and Blackjack tables upstairs in the TV room and filling the house with people, it never felt too crazy inside, the acoustics were great and there was plenty of room in the fridge for what seemed like unlimited booze.

One of our original goals for the house was to make it a social space for this kind of thing and it sure beats hanging out in a sleazy bar with dubious punters and unpredictable music. Oh dear, I really have gotten old...

A taxing situation

Last week I got a letter from Parcel Force telling me I had received a package from New Zealand. They were holding it until I paid £28.64 VAT and a £13.50 clearance fee. I had no idea who had sent his package or what was in it so was loathe to hand over £42.14 for what could be something I didn't want. Heck, £40 buys an hour long massage, a hair cut or a week's worth of lunches.

Rob found out that my sister-in-law had sent me a painting for my upcoming birthday and was horrified that I wouldn't just pay to have it delivered. As the item was a gift this riled me even more - surely gifts are VAT exempt? Especially as the painting has no proven value (my sister-in-law has never sold a painting). I emailed customs and got an auto reply which basically said "Pay up or we'll ship it back. If you want to query the VAT you can take it up once you have received the item". As my sister-in-law had paid NZ$70 to post it over it seemed unreasonable to send it back as she'd have to spend the same again to re-ship it with a lower value on the customs declaration.

I was still annoyed about the unfairness of the situation when Rob volunteered to pay up so that the package would be delivered in time. And despite all this drama, I really do love the painting. It'll look great in our house if we ever get around to hanging it up (yes, I know this was a mission a few weeks ago but so far not a single bit of art has made it onto the wall...)

The moral of the story is if you are posting something to another country, don't over inflate the value of the item on the customs declaration, even if it's marked as a gift. (Rob would probably add something about my being ungracious and that I should've just paid without querying it, but that goes against my nature)

Re-mortgage fun

Hello spring, about freakin' time. London seems to have been suffering from the mother of all deluges for what feels like weeks and now we've had two consecutive days of blue skies. The park is popping with flowering bulbs and it's nice to cycle without having to wear horrid waterproof tent trousers.

Spring is about the nicest thing to happen this week. I am suffering from a comedown - Depeche Mode's Tour of the Universe is now over and I only got to see them five times. Pictured at top is the side view from the front row of my box seat at the Royal Albert Hall a couple of weeks ago.

And as of yesterday our mortgage went up six and a half times.

Yeah it's a massive sum compared to what we've been paying, but it's still lower than it was when we actually bought it, so I'm trying to look on the bright side (AARRRGGGGGHH). Mind you, we could knock nearly £200 off a month if we can get the bank to reassess the valuation it gave us by a relatively teensy sum (within the £10K "margin of error" apparently).

The problem is 1. our mortgage broker is leaving her job next week and 2. there's a massive backlog at the bank.

Hopefully this will be sorted very soon. In the meantime, the babysitter has been cut to two nights per month and it looks like our Easter holiday will be spent in the vicinity of the house (AARRRRRRGGGHHH).

And breathe.